I sit here in pain from a night that I wish not to hash out before you. Physical, mental and emotional pain. But what I wish to convey is this..... Who are You.
I started this journey to find the truth in "religion" or more to the point God. I wanted to find a more perfect form in which to wholly embrace and worship Him. As I search I find more corruption in writing than I do in the words of the followers. Is this the way we believe? "Get what you want out of it and focus on those points", "search but don't take the liberty of testing itself with itself." or is it merely, "truth is what your mind makes it."
I wish to say I have had enough. But I know that will not happen. I am tired of asking those who are in the "know" because they don't. Preach one thing teach another. The mouth of man is his ultimate curse. Show the faults of patriarchs and those around retort, "No, that's not what they meant." then proceed to give you the brainwashed version of their vision of truth. And for those of you reading this......NO IT"S NOT BACKLASH AGAINST YOUR PRECIOUS RELIGION. IT IS ABOUT EVERYONE OF THEM. sorry for the yelling but I will hurt so many of you that are close that are reading this. Yeah pain does funny things to the body and mind but I have been in this state of doubt for weeks now. my only reprieve. A small joyous vacation with my family.
this from the nkj if you so believe in the bible.
James 1:26-27
26 If anyone among you thinks he is religious, and does not bridle his tongue but deceives his own heart, this one’s religion is useless. 27 Pure and undefiled religion before God and the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their trouble, and to keep oneself unspotted from the world.
Enough is enough. Though my search continues for THE Truth.
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